Pale Substitution
by pandorabox82
Summary: Alex and Emily just use each other in order to forget the one woman always on their minds. Written to promote the Profiler Choice Awards


"So, what's this Blake woman like?" Emily said lowly, looking over at her from Reid's desk. There was something about her that Emily wasn't sure that she liked, something just seemed a bit off. And then, a loud laugh erupted from Rossi's office, causing all of them to look up. Erin was standing in there, a look of pure pleasure on her face, the laughter coming from her mouth, and Emily sighed deeply. Happening to glance over at Blake, she saw the woman almost copy verbatim her feelings, and she knew, in that moment, how alike they were.

Then, their eyes met, and she watched as Blake's widened, a tiny gasp escaping her lips before she lifted one elegant hand to her mouth, covering it delicately. Emily nodded slightly, watching the woman blush and duck her head. In that moment, she knew that they would have to talk over drinks, she had to figure out if they shared the same unattainable goal. "Hey, Em, I asked if you wanted to go out to the bar with us."

She looked up at Derek and nodded, smiling softly. "That sounds lovely. Is Blake going to join us?"

"Wow, you really want to know more about her," Reid remarked and she narrowed her eyes at him, causing him to back off a little. "And yes, she's joining us. Now that James left, for good, she joins us every time."

Emily filed away that little piece of information and stood, shrugging back into her coat. "Well, let's head out then. No time like the present to start drinking." She grinned brightly at Reid and held out her hand. He clasped it tightly and she dragged him over to the elevators, the other following in their footsteps. And then, she noticed that Dave and Erin were at the tail end of the group, right behind Alex. As Emily watched, the woman stiffened ever so slightly, and she nodded in sympathy.

Alex shrugged before averting her eyes and quietly talking to Hotch. Emily sighed a little as she stepped into the elevator, letting Penelope grab hold of her hand as she bombarded her with questions of her life in London. She humored her friend and answered, all the while keeping her eyes on Alex and Erin.

She was separated from them once they gathered in the parking garage, and she frowned a little as Derek and Penelope frog-marched her over to their car. Emily found herself drawn to the woman who she had only heard of until moments before. She tried to participate in the conversation Penelope was holding, but her heart wasn't in it. She gave a half-smile as they parked next to an unfamiliar car and the woman in question and Reid stepped out.

Deciding to throw propriety to the wind, she threaded her arm through the other woman's and walked inside with her. "So, you're the person who took my place, in more ways than one. How do keep from letting her know that she's the sun you orbit around?"

The older woman gasped lightly and locked eyes with her. "Excuse me?"

"Don't try to hide it. I'm a profiler, just like you. I saw how you reacted to her laughter," she replied as she led her over to a free group of tables. Morgan and Hotch pushed them together to make room for them all and she held all the more tightly to Alex's arm. "Hey, we're going to head to the bathroom, Hotch. Order me my usual."

He nodded, giving her a probing look. She smiled back at him, raising her eyebrow as they sailed past him and then Erin and Dave. She didn't change her gait or look at the woman, but still, she felt the way her body reacted to her close proximity. Alex was the same way, she could tell by the way she also stiffened. Subtly, she tried to pull away from her, and Emily tightened her grip, finally getting her into the bathroom. "What is your problem?" the woman asked, an angry look on her face.

"Nothing. I just know your secret." And with those words said, she locked the door and then pushed Alex back against the mirror, holding her wrists above her head with one hand while leaning in and kissing her fiercely. The woman tried to squirm away, but Emily used all her weight to hold her there, nipping at her bottom lip as she deepened the kiss. Emily could feel the exact moment she gave in, slumping against the sink and then returning the kiss with the same ferocity.

In that moment, Emily let her arms go so that she could wrap her now free arm around the woman's waist, tugging her up so that she could trail her lips down the column of her neck before peppering kisses all along the neckline of her blouse. "Emily, stop, please," she panted out and Emily looked up at her.

"Why?"

"Because we're just using each other. We're pale substitutes of what we really desire. Because I feel close to shattering, and I don't know if it's from sorrow or want."

"Don't you think that we should find that out?" she whispered, reaching out and stroking Alex's hair lightly. "After all, it seems like we've made a pretty good connection here already." She leaned in and brushed her lips against Alex's once more, feeling the woman kiss her back. "And I'll take a pale substitute over nothing these days. And if you call me Erin, I won't mind at all."

Alex gave Emily a sad smile. "You're too lovely to waste time on me," she whispered, and it was then that she knew how deeply insecure the other woman was, how much life had battered her, much like Emily's life had. A few tears began to gather in her eyes, and Emily sighed lowly.

"And you're too lovely not to spend some time with. I'm going to give you one more kiss and then you are coming back to my hotel room." Emily waited until Alex nodded and then she tugged at the neckline of her blouse, pressing her lips to the swell of her breasts, letting her tongue snake out to flick against one lace covered nipple. "You are going to be mine tonight, and maybe we'll excise the specter of her."

"Perhaps," was the only answer she received.

**NOMINATIONS HAVE STARTED FOR PROFILER'S CHOICE CRIMINAL MINDS FANFIC AWARDS! Calling all CM readers and authors! Join us for the annual Profiler's Choice CM Awards on fanfiction . net! Help us choose the best of the best of the CM stories on this site, and let your voice be heard. Please check out the nomination ballot and rules at the ProfilerChoiceAwards2013 Forum. All rules and information are on the forum. Nominations are due October 31st. All entries with ten or more categories filled out are eligible to win one of two Amazon gift cards!**


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